kawaii-santa-chan: kawaii-santa-chan: kawaii-santa-chan: there is no teacher in my history class rn and we are all just sitting here and being really quiet and whenever somebody opens the door, everyone turns around because we think its a sub but its not and then we just shush whoever walks in update: we’re taking attendance and sending it down so nobody suspects that we dont have a...
awdray: I can’t fuckig stand those girls that comment on people’s photos and are like “that thigh gap 😍” like shut the fuck up please. You shouldn’t be allowed near a keyboard or a phone with a keyboard f you comment on people’s photos doing that.
drunktrophywife: Amanda Bynes wasn’t allowed on a flight because she didn’t have proper id because the id she tried to use was “im Amanda Bynes google me”
peregr1ne: my mom is trying to pick a colour for her new wheelchair and me and my dad are telling her to get black and she’s just like “but how will I know if someone is stealing it” and my dad is just like “because you’ll be sitting on the floor” and she slapped him
i’m jealous of people who have cute laughs and fast metabolisms and nice teeth and good hair and can just make any outfit look good and get along with everyone and are great at sports and do well in school because none of that is me
immiqrant: YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW LONG I’VE BEEN TRYING TO FIND THIS VIDEO
chickensandwich: i am such a cuddly little baby because i like to be snuggled and i like to feel kisses on my neck and i like to sleep and feel you breathing on me and i just want to be close and feel a connection
hippyjamfest: I want to join your hardcore band but my mom wants to talk to your mom first
apatheticghost: my dad just yelled “IT SOUNDS LIKE YOURE MAKING OUT WITH SOMEONE YOU BETTER NOT HAVE A BOY IN THERE”
thecompanionsdoctor: Whenever my friend says goodnight to me on Skype he sends me this gif and I wanted to send it to him tonight so I went to Google “black man turning off lamp” but Google autofill changed it to “black man turning into jet” and I got this Long story short it’s 1am and I’ve been laughing at this for approximately 20 years
best-of-funny: loverstabbedaswordthroughmyheart: i-was-so-alone-and-iou-so-much: vangoghstars: sparkafterdark: glamour-parade: How do you politely tell someone that you want them naked on top of you I’m pretty much positive that’s why poetry was even invented in the first place. for the constellations of your skin to brush against the earth of mine i would swim the seas a...
k1mkardashian: instantlemonade: that moment at night where you decide to just do your homework in the morning that moment in the morning where you wish you did your homework the night before
snckpck: DONT BE AFRAID TO MOVE ON IF THE PERSON YOU LIKE DOESNT LIKE YOU BACK. GRAB A BOTTLE OF FRUIT PUNCH AND BAG OF DORITOS AND LIVE YOUR LIFE!!!
squareclocks: I fucking hate it when you’re in such a fantastically giddy mood and then you see one simple little thing that makes you think, “oh” and then you just get this empty feeling in your chest and you get nauseous and the world just crumbles and you want to just lay under a blanket and close your eyes and fall asleep and never wake up.
poopflow: sometimes i hate it when people call it a bad relationship when really all it takes is to say to the other person “hey i really dont like when you…. could you try to not do it, for me?” and sometimes that’s all it takes. relationships are for two people that work together and communicate. you cant get anywhere by not saying something.
poopflow: cause of death: second hand embarrassment
jesussbabymomma: DOES ANYONE ELSE MAKE SCENARIOS IN THEIR HEAD OF THEM DATING SOMEONE AND HAVING THE PERFECT RELATIONSHIP AND DOING CUTE COUPLE THINGS WITH THAT PERSON BECAUSE ME 24/7